I decided to try this 31-day blogging challenge (thanks Lesa Townsend). I happened to be on Twitter and saw her tweet. Without much thought,
I decided to join. At the moment when I pressed the button to join the
challenge I thought, Oh, this might be fun so why not. However, after a moment
of reflection I rethought the benefit of this challenge. It became more than an
opportunity for fun. It has turned into an opportunity for me to (re)claim an
aspect of my identity—my voice.
Thinking about what I might blog about for the next 31 days
has led me to think critically about why I’m not blogging consistently. Part of
why I have not been blogging consistently is the after effects of being the
direct target of raced-sexism and misogyny. As a critical Black feminist/womanist
scholar I am familiar with the literature on how these systems of oppression
affect us at the micro and macro levels. I have read the literature on how
racism and sexism, while not causing illness, can exacerbate illness. However,
to live with it is something different. As we say in Barbados, “come see me and
come live with me are two different things.”
Deciding to participate in this challenge, in conjunction
with having to go back to the place associated with my hurt/attack, has shown
me the depth of the impact. I’m hesitant and a tad shy about writing.
Especially writing from a critical perspective. My experience has not only
impacted my critical writing, but has also had a physical impact. Starting in
September I experienced weight gain (although my diet and exercise habits have
not changed) and I also experienced severe headaches. These are physical
manifestations of stress. But not just the everyday stress associated with
daily life. This is stress directly related to raced-sexism.
Raced-sexism extracts a toll on all of us, albeit in
different ways and with different intensity levels. One of the ways I explain
the impact of raced-sexism to my students is to use the analogy of a paper cut.
I use this analogy as so many seem to believe that since raced-sexism isn’t as
visible, relative to earlier manifestations, that there is an absence of these
oppressive structures. However, I tell them that like a paper cut, the person
with the cut feels it, although it might not be easily visible. And if you have
ever experienced a paper cut, you know how easy it is to open it up and for you
to experience that pain over again.
Critical writing seems to open up my experiences with
raced-sexism. So I will use this challenge to (re)claim an element of me that’s
been missing these past few months. What exactly I’ll blog about is a mystery
to me. I’m thinking that I’ll blog around 3 general themes (themes to be
identified later). All posts might not be critical, but at least I’ll know that
my love of writing, which has been put on a shelf these last few months, can be
slowly and steadily nourished to life. While
I don’t know necessarily know what I’ll post about, I do know the following.
All posts will be honest and from the heart and I'll only write on what I'm passionate about.
In the meantime, I ask you to share your thought on some
topics that I might blog about. I want this experience to be a conversation and
not a monologue. You can also tweet your suggestions to me at Dr_JZ
(use #31dbc). So I’m eagerly looking forward to hearing from you.
